cos I’m just a teenage dirtbag baby

I’ve actually been having my attachment at heart centre close to a year now.


its always kinda confusing to explain cos its split into 2 parts: lessons +clinical attachment.
the lessons are the lectures with various doctors and cardiac technologists in available venues at heart centre.the clinical attachment refers to 8-530 internship at the cardiac labs at heart centre, where patients come in for diagnostic tests asked for by their doctors.

A year has 2 semesters and each semester was halved into lessons followed by clinical attachment.

so its been lessons, clinical attachment, lessons, clinical attachment. and i’m in the last phase now.

wow i should have explained it in this manner all along. gosh. sounds so much clearer. i swear no one in my life, not even close family and friends can remember how my attachment to heart centre works, no matter how many times i explain.


but its alrighttt 😀
anyway its supposed to be monday to friday (except wednesdays, those are sp days where i return to sp (well that’s not right either, i return to sp on monday nights as well for my dip plus classes but ok that’s not important)) 8-530. which begs the question, why am i typing gleefully on my laptop in my air conditioned room at 4pm on a sunny yellow banana thursdayafternoon? :)))
well its cause there was a medical conference and so there weren’t any doctors around! i was assigned to the electrophysiology labs this week, its invasive stuff so there has to be doctors around, unlike in certain non-invasive stuff. hence, i could leave!!! i was friggin overwhelmingly overjoyed, couldn’t stop smiling as i changed out of my scrubs and left the electrophysiology labs.

i couldn’t really do the non invasive stuff either cos i wan’t in proper attire. so i stayed around heart centre till like lunch time, had lunch at tiong bahru market and left. and now i’m here.

i was extremely relieved i didn’t have to be at the electrophysiology lab today cos i was just.. no mood la. yesterday i was even comtemplating getting an mc. when i’m so friggin guai i’ve never even gotten an mc before just to skip something. and this morning i took an extra 4 minutes in the shower. IF THOSE WEREN’T CLEAR-AS-A-SUNNY-YELLOW-BANANA-DAY SIGNS  I was unwilling to go to work i don’t know what would be.

and then i reflected on the whole situation.

it just felt wrong leh.

i actually liked attachment. it was fun. wait, not all the time if not i wouldn’t have slept before in echocardiography tests and in the catherization lab. i guess, sometimes it was fun. at rare moments where i actually learnt something, or discovered that i had learnt something i at one point didn’t think i could grasp. or just having some light hearted banter with people around you; technologists, heath assistants, nurses, doctors, and best of all, patients.


those were great times. they were special. but sadly those moments are intensely overshadowed by the mind numbing boredom that comes when i’m not learning anything.

you know sometimes when you  wake up, you’ve overslept so you’re more than well rested and you just lie in bed awake for another 20-30mins ? and you just don’t feel good?

its like that with the boredom i get during my attachment. i’m so useless its irritating, TO ME. I’M IRRITATED BY MY OWN BOREDOM OMG

i’m like the dryest sponge on earth. and i’m dying to be used for my function as an attachment student: TO LEARN.

on tuesday i learnt that in EP  patients with typical A flutter we have to ablate the cavotricuspid isthmus, located between the inferior vena cava and the tricuspid annulus. after which, we also have to minimize the arrythmic recurrence rate. therefore we use differential pacing to distinguish between a complete linear isthmus block and persistant conduction. the initial and terminal componanet of local potentials reflect activation at particular borders of the ablation lesion. if the terminal componant shortens or has no change: there is a block (YAY) and if it lengthens then there is persistant conduction and you gotto ablate somemore.

i learnt so much that day! from google lol. and piecing together things i wrote down that the technolgists and doctors were saying to each other.

cos the fact of the matter is there is NO TRAINING PROGRAMME. I AM NOT AN INTERN. I AM NOT WORKING.  I am a stupid zo dang poly student placed in the midst of people who know what they’re doing and could teach but won’t cause they don’t think its their job. they’re not paid any extra to train or teach us on top of their job so if they actually do, its totally out of their own goodwill.

and i understand that. but god it sucks! i don’t think my school is aware they paid for my course students to become bloody zo dang poly kids.

the hospital has NO INCENTIVE to train us. the money we give them goes to inviting doctors for lectures and general administrative paperwork. oh which reminds me!  i’m not being paid for turning up 8-530 everyday for months.

zilch. and its makes good sense. we’re not decreasing their workload. if anything we slow them down you know why?

COS WE ARE THE ZO DANG KIDS!!!!!!! HEAR US ROAR!!!!!!

 

 

 

 

sorry.

just, frustrated you know?

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